Harvard Houses as Classic Easter Candy

’Tis the season for the sprint to finals! As you read this, adequately rested (with perhaps a bit of raging, peeling sunburn from your Puerto Rico spring break), it’s hard to fathom having to be fully back at school for the last five weeks. But fear not, there are things to look forward to! Natasha Bedingfield, yes, but also the post-Easter CVS clearance aisle.

No one has experienced pure joy until they have gone to the post-Easter CVS clearance aisle. Pastels, chocolate, and seasonal bunny-shaped goods galore! In preparing to raid the candy inventory once April 21 hits, here’s what sweet treats I think the Easter Bunny would identify with each Harvard House.

Adams: Cadbury Crème Egg

Who can resist a decadent chocolate moment? Something so decadent and delectable — that is, for all of one bite before it becomes too over-the-top. Perhaps this parallels the vibe of Adams House: a hit of an indulgent sugar high with a marble staircase on the side. It either pleases your sweet tooth or gives you a sickening stomachache from the five different Adams-affiliated buildings you stop by during River Run.

Cabot: Jelly Beans (BeanBoozled Edition)

Let’s be real, Cabot’s got range. Just like jelly beans. From huge singles to a carpeted dining hall, it is just like reaching into the bag and getting anything from butter popcorn flavor to a taste of dirty dishwasher. When you’re in the Quad, you never know what you’re about to taste. Scooter or shuttle ride? The thrill of not knowing never ends.

Currier: Peeps

The least divisive Easter candy… or perhaps the most? Everyone loves to love them, except those who don’t. Just like Currier, they are iconic for a reason. They are vibrantly yellow and bright, sprinkled with sugar and cheer, but also texturally confusing. I just know Bill Gates loves Peeps. Peep cameo in next year’s Housing Day video?

Dunster: Pastel M&Ms

Dunster just is demure like that. Poised, elegant, beautiful, overlooking our lovely Weeks Bridge and Charles River. But as much as we enjoy pastel M&Ms, they have their flaws, too, like when the color starts to bleed in your sweaty palms, or when you somehow find melted chocolate seeping out of the package into your jacket pocket. Probably happened on the walk back to Dunster!

Eliot: Lindt Gold Bunny

Shiny. Expensive. Pretty on the outside. Yet once you scratch the surface, the allure is gone. Eliot boasts wealth and cool — it’s all wrapped up in gold foil. But when you actually peel it back and take a bite, you realize that it’s not all that good. It is your standard waxy milk chocolate, that is all.

Kirkland: Reese’s Peanut Butter Egg

Classic, reliable, and yet somehow overlooked? Kirkland may get a certain rep, but the community sure is strong. They embrace anything that boosts spirit and morale, and something tells me they would even welcome the peanut allergy kids. I do think Reese’s Eggs and Kirkland could both use better PR teams, though.

Leverett: Lindt Chocolate Carrots

Carrots → Bunnies → Leverett. This one was too on the nose to not include. No further explanation needed.

Lowell: Ferrero Rocher Egg

A rare, delectable, and highly coveted treasure in the sea of Harvard Houses. One that I find to be kind of boring, frankly, but the chimes of the bell tower and small fragments of hazelnut seem to attract the same kind of attention and the same crowds. No one would be discontent to see this (or a letter placing them in Lowell House) in their Easter Baskets.

Mather: Sour Patch Bunnies

Sour then sweet! Said no one but Mather residents themselves. While I feel almost as if Mather doesn’t deserve this candy, as it is one of my personal favorites, I think it is extremely fitting as the Easter Sour Patch is one that grows on you. With its take on flavors like grape and watermelon, it is super odd at first bite, but soon you won’t be able to stop dreaming of the fruity flavors paired with just the right tinge of citric acid, kind of like the guaranteed singles and concrete exterior.

Pfoho: Whoppers Robin Eggs

Vibes. It’s hard to explain but just the overall vibe. I feel like the Pfoho Igloo is slightly reminiscent of these eggs’ hard, crunchy malt exterior followed by the extra sweet milk chocolate. And what is malt, anyway? What is Pfoho, anyway??

Quincy: Pastel Hershey’s Kisses

Tried and true. Never gets old. Consistent all. Year. Round. That is Quincy in a nutshell for you, just like a classic Hershey’s Kiss. Sure it doesn’t have the pop and Yellow Dye 5 of classic Easter Peeps, but where it lacks in scary coloring, it makes up for by being a House that anyone can fall back on at any time. You know what to expect, and you always love it after. Of course, I’m not biased at all as a Quincy resident myself.

Winthrop: Russell Stover Marshmallow Eggs

In an ideal world, these sound like they’d be amazing, right? Almost as if someone combined the Hershey’s Kisses and Peeps mentioned earlier. But it’s weird. Everything about these chocolate-covered marshmallow eggs seems to be great except for the absolutely unforgivable choice to use crunchy chocolate to host this symbiotic relationship between marshmallows and chocolate. Sound familiar? Everyone loves Winthrop and loves to love on Winthrop EXCEPT for the lingering, musty smell of the dhall.

Whether you are a seasonal staple or a zesty Peep, everyone has a special place in their heart for their sweet treat. Happy early Easter, and best of luck in your upcoming discount candy search journey!