People Watching in Harvard Yard

Harvard Yard: Where an elite college meets a popular tourist attraction. The Yard is home to sleep-deprived students, surprisingly bold squirrels, YouTubers interviewing students for their 10k subscribers, and of course, tourists. For any new students coming to campus, here’s who you’ll find while rushing to Annenberg.

Spy vs. Spy

At first glance, you may be confused. Is this a proctor taking pictures to use as incriminating evidence of you sitting six feet too close to your friends? Or maybe they’re a Yale student, coming to campus to dig up our darkest secrets. Never mind, turns out they’re just another tourist who will go back home with blurry photos of Harvard students.

Touching John Harvard’s Foot

Honestly, all we feel is pity. Don’t you see the shadows of a stream under the foot? The only remnants of a night most of us have forgotten? It does offer us some entertainment, however, seeing those bright-eyed tourists rub that foot like Aladdin’s lamp. Oh no, are you licking it? No no, please don’t, I beg you.

Fig Magazine

If you’re studying on the steps of Widener Library, you’re sure to see at least one person posing in front for the classic Harvard picture. Use this opportunity to kickstart your modeling career! Smile at the camera and give a thumbs up, hiding the fact that your pset is slowly killing you inside.

Clueless (college, not high school)

For some reason, these tourists tend to walk in packs. They manage to somehow cover the entire width of the sidewalk when you’re just trying to get to Annenberg before lunch ends. Bonus points for when they ask you for directions to the Law School and you’re just as lost as them.

Fitness goons

There’s countless places to exercise. The gym, the Charles, a playground. For some reason, however, some people choose the Yard. For those of us there to socialize, nothing really sets the tone like a rando grunting while doing lunges up the steps nearby. Props to y’all for staying active, but can you take it elsewhere?

YouTubers

These are easy to spot. They’re usually carrying a tripod, and expensive-looking camera, and generally look much more put together than the hungover students in sweats walking to their 9 a.m. classes. If you’re lucky enough, you might appear in their “Are Harvard students smarter than a fifth grader?” video later, making a fool of yourself. How’s a comp sci major supposed to know who the last queen of France was?

All in all, Harvard Yard is still a heartwarming place for all of us. Every time you make the trek in front of Widener and feel the stares of what seems like hundreds of eyes, just remember that you too can sit on the steps and watch as people traverse through the Yard. Just don’t slip and fall, that’d be pretty embarrassing.