How To Be the Most Freshman Freshman While You Still Can

With the end of academic year fast approaching, the Class of 2020 is likely excited about moving out of the lower ranks of Harvard's social hierarchy and finally becoming upperclassmen. Little do they know that the stress of concentration declaration and recruiting sometimes strikes the hearts of ~cool~ sophomores and seniors with nostalgia for the sweet innocence of freshman year. Remember when you still wanted to “make a positive impact” with your degree and weren’t crushed by the superiority of your peers? Freshmen, take heed and enjoy the joys of your first and last chill year of college before they become socially unacceptable.

By Courtesy of Harvard Admissions and Financial Aid

Wear your lanyard AND your Harvard Class of 2020 shirt

Nothing betrays a freshman more than the utilitarian but very un-hip lanyard and basic class shirt everyone got in the mail. Still, not being recognized as a Harvard student by tourists is pretty damaging to your ego, so don the unofficial uniform of opening days while society still forgives you for this ultimate fashion faux-pas.

Party irresponsibly

Don’t get us wrong: wandering around the square in an attempt to find a final club with the lowest admittance standards, sloppily making out with a pre-orientation buddy, and drunkenly chowing down at the Kong at 3 a.m. are all unacceptable gaffes. But if you're a freshman high on the lack of parental supervision, gross partying is still kinda cute. When you’re an upperclassmen it’s just sad.

Be annoying in class

This is the only time you can raise your hand in class and lay out ten types of pens on the table without instantly becoming section kid. You’re not overeager—college just hasn't crushed your spirit yet. Yet.

Befriend Tommy D

Dean Dingman is very chill but he only chills with freshmen, so if you want to be friends with the most charming of middle-aged bros, befriend him before you become irrelevant.

“Accidentally run” into your First Chance Dance/Opening Days fling in the Berg

Unless they live in the same House as you next year, you will never have to deal with the agony of you and your ex both reaching for the mashed potatoes at the same time. So embrace the sitcom-worthy awkwardness while you still can—it’ll make a funny story to tell during the reunion brunch senior year.

Before you move on up to House life burn your freshman dorm t-shirt and don’t forget to say bye to John—he will surely miss you.