The Noshoes Verdict: Why We've Had Three Snow Days
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She saved us all. By Betty Anne Richardson
Throughout its history, the oh so prestigious Harvard University seems to have tried to prove something to its students and to the world: that the Big H turns down for nothingâ not even snow days. Somehow, apparently, I feel like the administration thinks that Harvard will seem more superior if its students are forced to trudge through three feet of snow and 20022020 MPH wind to get to their 9 a.m. classes. (sidenote: THIS IS SO UNTRUE. WHEN WE HAD SCHOOL IN THE BLIZZARD LAST WEEK, ALL I LEARNED WAS THAT IT WAS POSSIBLE FOR ME TO FALL INTO LIKE TEN SNOWBANKS IN FIVE HOURS AND I ENDED UP FREEZING IN CLASS AND I WAS TOO DISTRACTED BY THE COLD ALL CLASS AND I COULDNâT LEARN ANYTHING OTHER THAN HOW COLD I WAS.)
Anyways, in the past three weeks, weâve had three snow days, basically just as many as Harvard University has announced since the Blizzard of â78. Iâm sure everyone has their own interpretation as to why weâve been lucky enough to have had so many snow days (let alone any snow days) in such a short amount of time, but Iâm here to tell you the real reason: me.
So before you go thanking the brutal New England weather, find ya girl and give her a hug because I am the snow day good luck charm hero that Harvard needs and deserves. If you arenât yet convinced solely because of my extremely good looks and charm, I guess I can give you a few reasons to prove why we have had three snow days in three weeks because of me.
1) 1/26/15: Australia Day
Our first snow day of my Harvard career was âconvenientlyâ the day after Australia Day was celebrated in the beautiful, outstanding, flawless United States of America. Of course I was going to celebrate Australia Day when I should have been finalizing my classes. Not only is one of my best friends straight out of Aussie, but also I love nothing more than celebrating in the best colors ever aka red, white, and blue. So, of course, no surprise at all, as my friends and I were celebrating whatever Australia celebrates on Australia Day, we got that good good text from the College telling us school would be canceled the next day. Well, of course. How else did Drew Faust expect me to get from the Quad to my room on Australia Night if she also expected me to attend class the next morning? Of course, she knew this was impossible, especially since my best friend, Uber, was not allowed to be on the streets.
2) 2/9/15: OEB Makeup Final at 9 a.m.
No, I still have not taken my finals from last semester. Because shout out to whomever landed on my head when everyone stormed the field at H-Y and gave me a concussion. It was the day before my OEB makeup final and I was on Chapter 4 of 36 and so I began praying. At about 7 p.m., I found out that I had been praying to the one and only Stephen Lassonde (thanks for those dope emails about snow days and continuing to use the phrase âcritical personnelâ). He even bolded in his snow day email that FINALS WOULD BE POSTPONED (Iâm going to take that as a personal s/o to me).
3.) 2/10/15: Linguistics Makeup Final at 2 p.m.
You already know the deal. Stephen Lassonde answered my prayers once more. He absolutely received the vibes I sent him. I sent him vibes that I had been so preoccupied with studying for my Monday exam that I had no time yet to consider my next makeup final. So, he decided that I deserved another snow day. He realized, âWhy make Betty stressed to the max during her sophomore spring when some unidentified large male at Harvard-Yale decided that her big Irish head was a good landing spot in spite of the entire span of the football field?â So, that is how snow day number 3 of 2015 was decided.
If you would like to challenge my thoroughly analyzed data and computations, hmu. Until then, before you question how/why Harvard has had so many more snow days in this short semester than it ever has in history, remember that ya girl has you covered.