Freshman Formal! The Glitz! The Glamour! The Dresses! The Cake!

The class of 2016 was whisked away for an evening in Hollywood last night, proving once and for all that class is just a bowtie away.

We were overwhelmed by the A-list quality of the meal, which culminated in a chocolate layer cake that would have had Dame Helen Mirren and Natalie Portman '03 in a fistfight—directed by Quentin Tarantino—for a space at the buffet. Diners were serenaded with the melodious warbling of "We Found Love" by what could easily have been Rihanna herself, but we were distracted by the bravery of those who dazzled in jewel-encrusted ball gowns on the equally crusty Annenberg floorboards.

The paparazzi were conspicuous in their absence as the glittering Silver Line buses pulled up, affording party-goers a scenic walk to the Westin Hotel. There, the Class of '16 rubbed elbows with the great and the good and what looked like a convention of a biker gang called the Renegade Pigs. The red carpet was rolled out and the ballroom was packed with the big names of the Harvard stage, field, and dorm, all of whom partied until the wee hours.

After an evening of glamour unparalleled by any other event in the Freshman social calendar—even the star-studded First Chance Dance—the magic of the night was concluded by a 45-minute wait for the coat check. They'd never have put President Lincoln—Mr. Day-Lewis, sorry—through this.