Pfoho Clarifies Position in Adams-Currier Kerfuffle

In a not-altogether-unsurprising turn of events, Pforzheimer House announced its position on the recent outbreak of war between Adams and Currier Houses. In the so-called "Mario Doctrine," named after Pforzheimer Building Manager and "Secretary of Depfense" Mario Leon and modeled on the Monroe Doctrine, Pforzheimer residents outlined that they "will not tolerate expansionist efforts from any River House."

The doctrine was penned by a group of students led by Paul E. Schied '13 following an exchange on the Pfoho Open e-mail list discussing the war and its implications for Pforzheimer House.

"The proposed River encroachment into the Northern Hemisphere will not be countenanced by Pforzheimer House. We continue to recognize Currier House as a legitimate and sovereign house, and call on the interhouse community to do the same," it states.

Pforzheimer also warned that "the full might and courage of the Pfolar Bear Cavalry shall be unleashed on Adams House if any members of Currier House are harmed or inconvenienced by the treachery and snobbery of Adams House."

"It needed to be made clear to the interhouse community that Pfoho would be prepare to use pforce to prevent river Houses from meddling in the Northern Hemisphere," Schied said in an e-mail to The Crimson.

Adams House Committee Special Events Chair Antone Martinho III '13, who issued the Declaration of War on behalf of Adams HoCo, was not aware of the Mario Doctrine as of Tuesday afternoon.

The Doctrine also made reference to the last major interhouse conflict, the Great Pfoho-Adams War of 1999. Schied concluded by saying, "We trust that Adams residents remember what happened the last time they started a war with a Quad house."

Stay tuned to Flyby for updates as they happen.

This post has been revised to reflect the following correction.

CORRECTION: APRIL 10, 2011

The April 10 post "Pfoho Clarifies Position in Adams-Currier Kerfuffle" incorrectly identified the Doctrine the document is modelled off. In fact, it is based off the Monroe Doctrine.