Madlib: How was your spring break?

Wondering how to respectfully and distantly inquire about a pal's break? FM has got you covered.

Oh my goodness, hello _______ (guy in my section whose name I don’t know/ran- dom hook-up/TF in the Gen Ed I never attend)! It is so _______ (great/awful/utterly irrelevant) to see you again. I _______ (missed you so much/did not think about you once/stalked you incessantly on Facebook) all week long! How was your spring break?

Wow, you _______ (saved all the orphans in Guatemala/went to the Caribbean with your performance group/nailed down your summer internship with Ernst & Young)? That’s so original! I barely did anything the entire week. I just _______ (saved all the orphans in Guatemala/went to the Caribbean with my performance group/nailed down my summer internship with Ernst & Young). Really, your break sounds so much more exciting.

Are you happy to be back on campus? I have so much to get done. I have a _______ (take-home midterm/take-home headache/take-home hook-up) from _______ (CS50/SLS20/Ec10) to deal with, an entire season of _______ (“Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt”/“House of Cards”/“Friends”) to binge-watch, and so many clubs to _______ (co-found/comp/delete the emails of). Oh, you already dealt with

your (take-home midterm/take-home headache/take-home hook-up), binge- watched an entire season of _______ (“Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt”/“House of Cards”/“Friends”), and _______ (co-founded/comped/deleted the emails of) a bunch of clubs? Well, good for you. That should make your _______ (semester/life/ budding alcoholism) much easier to handle.

It was _______ (fantastic/unfortunate/unavoidable) to bump into you, _______ (guy in my section whose name I don’t know/random hook-up/TF in the Gen Ed I never attend). We’ll have to catch up _______ (over coffee/next time I accidentally see you in the Yard/never).