15 Stories We Never Ran, And Never Will.

1. People who collect stuff. You know, like stamps and coins—stuff.

2. I was messing around with all the spices at the salad bar the other day and my chickwich has never tasted better! How about “Things You Can Make at Annenberg?”

3. Partying with Domna.

4. People who talk funny.

5. The Spare Change guy is so nice to me!

6. Is the Chessmaster a real master? Or, like, not?

7. Maybe we could hang out with the Pit kids. I bet they’d like us.

8. So, there’s this guy in my entryway and he’s always singing opera really loudly.

9. Who are all those old people in my classes? Why do they get to skip doing the papers?

10. Why is the Science Center so ugly?

11. So what’s up with Finals Clubs?

12. Why aren’t there more Vikings at Harvard?

13. I think this guy in my Sex section might be gay.

14. That last issue of the Lampoon was so funny.

15. My TF is hooking up with this girl in my section. Whoa!