Scoped!

Han Yu ’06

House: The Dudley Co-op

Concentration: VES

Hometown: Fuzhou, Fujian, People’s Republic of China.

Ideal date: A beauty queen handcuffed me to her futon.

Ideal mate: Someone who can cook Asian specialties and be funny and serious.

Your sexiest physical trait: Carefully arranged, unkempt hair.

Best way for a girl to get your attention: Eye me.

Where to find you on a Saturday night: At home, naked.

First thing you notice about a girl: Is she dorky? And then I wonder, does she respond to sexual advances?

What are you looking for in a girl? Well-proportioned physical characteristics.

Your best pickup line: “Come on...less drama, more action.”

The most memorable pickup line ever tried on you: Yesterday a Harvard Square panhandler eyed me and said, “I don’t want your ass.”

Best or worst lie you’ve ever told? “Mom, I wasn’t doing drugs! OK, fine, I was.”

Favorite thing about Harvard: The Co-op, in all its crunchy, homey, off-campus glory.

Most important thing you’ve learned at Harvard so far: I’ve never been in an institution so supportive of my narcissism.

Sketchiest moment at Harvard: I was attacked by the large, open, wet mouth of Crazy Greg.

One thing you must do before graduation: Run Primal Scream with a flopping strap-on.

Describe yourself in three words: www.hanacious.com.

In 15 minutes you are: Masturbating.

In 15 years you are: An artist.