Love it or Leeve it: Spreading Thanks Like Gravy

When the temperature in Cambridge falls to the point where the rain is so cold that you wonder how it’s not snowing, I long for my hometown of Houston, where it’s still 60-something degrees.

Objectively, it’s a little early for a Thanksgiving column, but I’m taking my cue from the stores around the Square and combining some of my thanks for gifts received with recent developments in the sports world. I thought that I’d spice things up like pumpkin pie and throw in a little ranting too, just like the mix of harmony and strife that accompanies any holiday gathering of family and friends.

Let’s start things off where I care the most—the great state of Texas—and take a moment to thank Yao Ming of the Houston Rockets.

Last Sunday, the Asian Invasion was 9-for-9 from the field, posting a career-high 20 points against the Lakers. True, he was probably only perfect because Shaq is still out with a big toe injury (sidenote: think how big Shaq’s big toe is, I mean seriously), but I’m still thankful that the 7’6” guy finally showed why the Rockets used the first overall draft pick on him. That this performance came against the detestable Kobe-led Lakers made it all the more satisfying.

But while there was rejoicing in Houston, there was no thanks to be had in Austin, since the Longhorns somehow lost at Texas Tech.

Not to be a snob, but Lubbock is the armpit of Texas. I can say this because I’ve talked to people from there who say that themselves, I’ve been there myself, and if you look at Texas on a map, Lubbock falls nicely into the pit area.

In this unfortunate setting, Chris Simms proved again why he’s no golden boy, throwing an interception on the Horns’ last drive, eliminating Texas from both Big 12 and national championship contention. Simms’ draft value is widely debated, and he has none of the scrappy style that defined his predecessor, Major Applewhite, he of small stature and great heart. No one would have predicted three years ago that people would say, “Oh, that Chris Simms, he’s no Major Applewhite,” but that’s what I’m repeating over and over to myself right now.

Speaking of vertically challenged athletes, I give thanks to the fact that Mike Hampton will carry his hefty 6.15 ERA down from the heights of the Rockies to the sea-level splendor of Atlanta, following a three-team swap that included the Marlins.

Hampy became “my man” when he was called up to the Houston bullpen in 1994, before all the Cy Young talk with the Astros and the Mets. I can only hope that this move rejuvenates his career much like the late Darryl Kile returned to winning form after being traded from Colorado to St. Louis.

I’d also thank Conan C. O’Brien ’85 for lining up tennis star Serena Williams along with Simpsons voices Nancy Cartwright, Dan Castellaneta and Harry Shearer for Thursday night’s show. Truthfully, I’m wondering how Conan, former president of the semi-secret Sorento Square social organization that used to occasionally publish a so-called humor magazine as well as ex-Simpsons writer and producer, will manage to devote enough attention to Serena with the likes of Bart, Homer and Mr. Burns around.

Closer to home, I’m less than thankful that Harvard proved the entire lineup of ESPN Gameday correct in picking Penn last weekend. But aside from the disappointing Crimson effort, I do remain thankful that the Ivy League got a little loving from the college football experts, including Brown grad Chris Berman.

I also feel supremely gratified that Eliot House was the backdrop used while showing Harvard stats, further proving that I live in the most beautiful housing on campus. Hey, Lowell, who’s got the better tower now, hmm?

In the end, I must say that I am most thankful that I get to go home next week to homecooked meals and days of drifting in and out of sleep in front of the TV. And when we come back refreshed from the break, I will give thanks that a new season will be well underway here at Harvard and spring training will be that much closer to beginning again.

—Staff writer Brenda E. Lee can be reached at belee@fas.harvard.edu.