Groovy Train: Comp Report: Harvard Media

TAMPOON

Devoted to "hole-plugging" and the menstrual cycle, this 'zine faithfully waxes dŽclassŽ on a semesterly basis. Their tampon jokes are hilarious-for the whole two minutes it takes to skim and toss. After exhausting all subtleties involved in the monthly shedding of the endometrial layer, Tampoon editors regularly indulge in jealous bashing of popular, attractive Hollywood celebs.

Reasons to comp Tampoon: Do you, too, rage with penis envy? Are you crafty with genital wart yuckyucks? If so, join this coven of PMSing lethal-femmes.

Contact: Liz Topp, topp@fas.harvard.edu

THE HARVARD INDEPENDENT

The Independent, a weekly newsmagazine embittered from perpetual scooping by the campus daily, goes by the diminutive "Indy." Kind of like indy rock. Sort of. Except not cool. The Independent's news pages capture its readership with hard-hitting stories about charity galas, graduation in June and similar breaking news. The most recent gem by their editor-in-chief is a column entitled "Why I Like Chemistry"-one man's struggle against the forces of an evil concentration. Racked by an inferiority complex, the Indy's new recruiting slogan is "once a week is good enough." So that's what they're telling people in therapy nowadays.

Reason to comp the Indy: feeling insecure about mediocre performance? Find Prozac pals here.

Contact: indy@hcs.harvard.edu, 5-7876

THE HARVARD CURRENT

The campus' newest political review is a starched-shirt gov jock's wet dream. The Current does a remarkable job cloning Newsweek, if only by ripping off its entire design scheme. Catering to your everyday baby milquetoast politico, this publication attempts to make politics sexy with full-color photos and glossy paper-if by "sexy" you mean "sterile and boring." We do appreciate the glossy paper, though.

Reasons to comp the Current: Good connections. Pads a resume nicely.

Contact: hcurrent@hcs.harvard.edu, 3-5819

SATIRE V

Founded by members of the class of '02, this rag bears an uncanny resemblance in its design to elementary school PTA newsletters. Playing butt-monkey to the Lampoon and Demon, Satire V has officially joined the select group of unread, unfunny self-proclaimed "humor" magazines guaranteed to leave a bad taste in the collective mouth of the Harvard populace. This freshman posse considers themselves real smarties by reversing the Harvard motto "Veritas." Backwards word, real clever.

Reason to comp Satire V: Bond with fellow Yardlings with palindrome fetish.

Contact: satirev@hcs.harvard.edu, 3-3652