Drinky Drink

We've all had the dream: you come across a busy intersection. Suddenly your bavarian clogs are pounding against the pavement as you weave in and out of traffic. You dart between two SUVs, shake a Lexus, and high-step your way across Mass. Ave., untouched for the score. But glory like that doesn't come without hard work, dedication, and sound fundamentals. Here to help with latter are some tips from FM's personal playbook:

Look directly at your opposition to stop him in his tracks. Most defenders will slow down if you get in their wayostop as if you are going to let him blow by, then start moving again to thoroughly confound and irritate him. This "stutter-step," coupled with a few head-fakes, should be enough to elude even compact cars. Keep your center of gravity low for best results.

While protecting the ball, use your free arm to keep the opposing team at bay. Face the palm outwards as if to thank them for deferring to your path. Keeping the elbow locked and signalling in this manner works for all but emergency vehicles.

You burst through the hole, found a seam and broke it wide openonow what? Spiking your shoulder bag is considered unsportsmanlike; signature celebration dances are also frowned upon. Instead, find and congratulate your lead blocker in an appropriate manner - we all know that there's no "I" in "team".