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Those life-defining experiences that close out the intangibles and isolate the moment. The unforgettable conversation that casts a new light on existence, a pinch of wisdom from the most unlikely character or a recovered friend who seemed lost long ago.
These invaluable milestones give substance to the adventure of living. Pitfalls arise and you step around them, windfalls pop up and you embrace them; they provide the marks on your personal timeline. And however substantive or imperceptible these gems appear at the time, they will inevitably provide comfort, advice and perspective throughout the journey.
My last year has been a period of rapid change and self-understanding, mostly attributable to reflecting on these small, meaningful nuggets. Although I've unearthed many milestones over the last 12 months, this past summer the opportunity arose to halt the roller coaster ride of life to explore where I'd been and question where I was going, instead of letting the scenery pass by in a flurry.
Until recently, such an ostensibly time-consuming process didn't occur often enough. But this was my first summer away from home and my first non-academic Cambridge living experience. These were welcome challenges, but I never realized how exciting and indelible they would be.
Roots are important. But being separated from them is crucial, at least to thrive as an individual. Finally being liberated from mom and dad (and my hometown), financially and socially, was fundamental to gaining a new perspective on personal evolution. It was both refreshing and daunting to realize that I ate, lived and earned money all by my own effort. Yes, there were school and family safety nets involved, but the opportunity to spread my wings and falter along the way was mine.
With this foundation in place, assessing life-so-far and refocusing priorities were now manageable, and they were even more invigorating when they popped up unexpectedly. In early August, a girl I met on a bus more than two years ago sent me a wonderfully insouciant letter that literally halted everything in my life for a few minutes.
On the grandest scale of life analysis, with appropriate gravity, I've been seeking to understand my parents as people.
Sadly enough, I don't think many of the experiences I had this summer would have had as instant or lasting an impact during the school year as they did. Living in Cambridge--outside of the school term bustle--encouraged a redefinition of the environment surrounding Harvard. In student mode, I often find myself not only isolated in the college bubble but confined to a rigidly proportioned schedule. Lately I've realized how absolutely unappreciative I am of the inconsistencies in life that make the scenery so interesting.
During the term, we as students invest all our might, racking our brains, even losing massive amounts of sleep, just to conceptualize information. How great life would be if more of that time was spent trying to figure out how the flaws-turned-gems of life fit into the context of existence. Academics and extracurriculars are important, even vital to our dynamic campus, but the weekly schedule can become stifling. Stepping back, dropping the task at hand for an evening (even if it means sacrificing a grade!) and embracing spontaneity or quality reflection time can be rejuvenating. Maybe the break would be cathartic enough to reclaim that grade and push it higher.
It seems that very few people sincerely, with an outspoken voice, value their four years here with heartfelt appreciation. There should be a golden regard for the priceless opportunities and impassioned people we meet on this campus.
Many recent experiences have motivated me to move in the direction of framing Harvard in this light, a light dimmed during the semester by the overwhelming energy on campus, whether it be in the form of studies, hobbies or jobs. These interests don't have to be suffocating, but Harvard students tend to sacrifice their passions for their ambitions.
These feelings are new to me, even after three years of experiencing the diversity of people, opinions and outlets here. For two months this summer, I gave admissions office tours to prospective students and their families. Giving tours was flexible, relaxing work. Because I was internally encouraged to focus on the good aspects of this school, reflecting positively on my stay so far has been unavoidable.
Harvard is a unique place. We are nourished for four years in a cushioned environment, an environment that cannot be replicated in the outside world. The cuddling allows us to develop an open mind and a scrutinizing eye, preparing us to deal with the challenges ahead. But if you don't stop to appreciate the opportunities here, the time is wasted. Ask any Harvard student and he or she will tell you your time here is full of milestones. Significantly fewer undergraduates, however, realize what a fertile ground Harvard can provide for reflecting on such moments.
Peter A. Hahn, a Crimson editor, is a senior in Mather House.
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