Where Have You Gone Dian Parkinson?

Back when Bob Barker still had black hair, families were feuding, and whammies were a menace to society, game shows ruled the television screen. During the golden years of gaming in the 1970s and early 1980s, millions of degenerate adults and sick schoolchildren could spend their days on the couch in the living room, watching non-stop game shows on the three major networks from 10 a.m. until 5 p.m. Sadly, many feel that today's shows fall short of capturing that tacky flair so critical to the classic game show experience.

Though spiffed-up versions of old standbys "Wheel of Fortune" and "Jeopardy" still attract cult followings, weak attempts at new shows abound on arcane cable channels, producing such soon-to-be forgotten titles as "Supermarket Sweep" and "That's My Dog." In its own class is "The Price is Right," enduring as an eternal relic of the past, with sets straight from the days when disco ruled and a box of SuperPolygrip cost $1.99.

Yet the great game shows of bygone days remain fixed in our subconscious. The obnoxious blare of a strike on "Family Feud," the whammies dancing across the screen in "Press Your Luck," the frenetic gesticulations of contests on the "$25,000 Pyramid:" all are permanently imprinted in the minds of many in our generation. Possibly Harvard's "Game Show Guru," Mandel N. Ilagan '99 admits that his first memories of television came in the form of game shows.

"The mark of a good game show," he says, "is one where you're yelling at the screen. There's some sort of play-along, and that's what sets game shows apart from other shows. Nice bells, buzzers and lights are also essential. It's the stereotype of a game show, but that's really what draws people to it. Plus the game itself. There has to be suspense and risk: the element of gambling."

Mandel also notes that hosts play integral roles in the success of game shows. Bob Barker reigns as the undisputed king of game show hosts, displaying super-human endurance with his 26 year stint on "The Price is Right." Fast approaching 80 years of age, Barker, who spends rerun seasons in a giant jar of formaldehyde, has also persevered through a publicity nightmare stemming from an affair with show model Dian Parkinson.

Most other shows have been through several hosts: believe it or not, Chuck Woolery (of "Love Connection" fame) hosted "Wheel of Fortune" before the legendary Pat Sajak took over. Further, as die-hard Wheel fans may recall, Sajak took a hiatus in the early 1990s to try his hand at late night television, leaving the show in the hands of Vanna White and several short-lived stiffs at a time when contestants still shopped for merchandise after each round. Some hosts have done double duty, like Alex Trebek, who at one time simultaneously hosted both "Jeopardy" and "Classic Concentration."

One ever exciting feature of game shows has been special episodes with celebrity participants. In recent years, "Jeopardy," Family Feud," and "Wheel of Fortune" have opened their games to famous actors and professional athletes. This trend is something of a takeoff on the regular appearances of second-rate stars on "Hollywood Squares" and "The $25,000 Pyramid" in the 1980s. However, possibly due to increased studio funding, the guest contestants on today's shows are certainly more credible than "Hollywood Squares" staples Jim J. Bullock, Louie Anderson, and Shadoe Stevens.

Many, though, still miss old favorites, like "Match Game," "Scrabble," "Card Sharks," "Sale of the Century" and "Password." Ilagan predicts, "Within the next few years there will be a bunch of new shows and revivals. TV runs in cycles, and it's a transition period for daytime programming."

The Guru's theories may prove to be correct. "Hollywood Squares" is set to reappear next season with Whoopi Goldberg in the center square. In addition, "Match Game," "Let's Make a Deal," and a revamped version of "The $25,000 Pyramid" are all set to make a comeback in the coming years.

When asked why game shows are irresistible to millions of viewers, Ilagan is eager to philosophize. "It's one of those unique forms of TV that really hooks the audience in," he says. "You're talking the average Joe and putting him on TV, creating a closer link between audience and show." Or perhaps it's simply the undefinable thrill of watching Evelyn from Tulsa drop her "Plinko" chip and following its bouncing descent towards the $5,000 slot.