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OpArt

By Ariel Foxman

BEST PICTURE

*"The Fugitive"--It's truly an honor just being nominated...

*"In the Name of the Father"--In the shadow of Schindler.

*"The Piano"--Any the year.

*"The Remains of the Day"--Howard's End" didn't win, why would its sequel?

*"Schindler's List"--'Nuff said.

Wish you were here: "Manhattan Murder Mystery"; "What's Eating Gilbert Grape.

BEST DIRECTOR

*Robert Altman, "Shot Cuts"-- So great, we forgot to nominate the film.

Kane Campion. "The Piano"--Two Oscar strike: 1)female 2)not Spielberg

*James Ivory, "The Remains of the Day"--perennial's never win.

*Jim Sheridan, "In the Name of the Father"--In the shadow of Spielberg.

*Steven Spielberg, "Schindler's List"--You've come a long way, baby

Wish you were here: Martin Scorses, "The Age of Innocence"; Barbra Streisand, "The Prince of Tides."

BEST ACTOR

*Daniel Day-Lewis, "In the Name of the Father"--Share the wealth. Already won for "My Left Foot"

*Laurence Fishburne, "What's Love Got to Do With It"-- He's the Bes Supporting.

*Tom Hanks, "Phildelphia"--Awarding the red-ribbon-cause, not the actor.

*Anthony Hopkins, "The Remains of the Day"-- He's better in "Shadowlands".

*Liam Neeson, "Schindler's List"--Forgest Schindler-sweep, "Darkman" can't win.

Wish you were here: Harrison Ford, "The Piano"; Robin Williams, "Mrs Doubtfire."

BEST ACTRESS

*Angela Bassett, "What's Love Got to Do With It"--Better than Tina herself. But can't forget Schindle trickle-down: Hunter must win to honor "The Piano."

*Stockard Channing '65, "Six Degrees of Separation"--One bad movie.

*Holly hunter, "The Piano"--Overcomes mute button and Princess Leia hairdo.

*Emma Thompson, "The Remains of the Day"--Can't win twice for same performance ("Howard's End").

*Debra Winger, "Shadowlands" -- Can lose twice for same performance ("Terms of Endearment").

*Wish you were here: Michelle pfeiffer, "The Age of Innocence."

BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR

*Leonardo DiCaprio, "What's Eating Gilbert Grape"--Wins qudiences' herts. Still, Dustin Hoffman already won that Oscar ("Rain Man").

*Ralph Fiennes, "Schindler's List--Best performance you love to hate.

*Tommy Lee Jones '69, "The Fugitive"--Rising star will catch up with Oscar.

*John Malkovich, "In the Line of Fire"--Too many disguises. Not enough John.

*Pete Postlewai the, "In the Name of the Father"--Could beat fiennes, but not Schindler.

Wish you were here: Gene Hackman, "The Firm"; Ben Kingsley, "Schindler's List"; Sean Penn, "Carlito's Way.'

BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS

*Holly Hunter, "the Firm"--Sorry, one per customer. This isn't the Grammy's.

*Anna Pawuin, "The Piano"--So good. So young . So right.

*Rosie Perez, "Fearless"--Didn't see it. Neither did the academy.

*Winona Ryder, The Age of Innocence"--Cataonia confused with talent. Would only win to appease Scorsese fans. Hollywood bites

*Emma Thompson, "In the Name of the Father"--There were longer, better cameos on "The Love Boat"

Wish you were here: Embeth davidtz, "Schndler's List"; Anjelica Huston, "Manhattan Murder Myster"; Miriam Margolyes, "The Age of Innocence,"

BEST ORIGINAL SONG

*Again, "Poetic Justice"--A lame song from an even lamer movie. Janet, don't cancel any tour dates to attend.

*The Day I Fall in Love, "Beethoven's 2nd"-- Whatever.

*Philadelphia, "Philadelphia"--Neil Young and Oscar. Too odd a couple.

*Streets of Philadelphia, "Philadelphia"--The Boss's song is the only thing that works in the movie. An affecting tune for an affecting subject.

*A Wink and a Smile, "Sleepless in Seattle"--Cheesy in Los Angeles.

*Wish you were here: Anything from "In the Name of the Father."

*And finally, one closing prediction: Whoopi's schtick will go the way of Martin Lawrence, prompting the academy to ban her from any future presentations.

Since we already know who's going to win and what's going to happen, all we, the viewers, can really hope for is an interesting opening medley and a show that comes in under four envelopes...it's Oscar time

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