THE ANGRY PILGRIM

Over the years, the Undergraduate Council has devised increasingly innovative ways of losing or wasting student money. Their ability to squander the funds of their constituents is rivaled only by that of the Federal government.

Now it looks like the council may have outdone itself (although that De La Soul debacle of a few years ago might be hard to beat). Members of the council, led by the illustrious Joshua D. Liston '95, have proposed spending $3,000 on a new Harvard mascot.

And what a mascot it is: the Angry Pilgrim. It would seem that the Angry Pilgrim would be an unfortunate mascot choice for a sports team, considering that Pilgrims were not known primarily for their athletic prowess or martial virtues. And they probably wouldn't have approved of football anyway.

The choice of the Angry Pilgrim would be especially unfortunate for a team up against the Yale Bulldogs. In a battle between a fierce canine and a Puritan minister, we'd put our money on the dog any day.

We at the Dartboard would also like to question the extravagant amount of $3,000 for the Angry Pilgrim's wardrobe. How hard can it be to dress a pilgrim? Three thousand dollars sounds suspiciously like haute couture for mascots--that is, if Giorgio Armani would ever waste his time designing a pilgrim outfit.

Not having a mascot has always given The Crimson a certain touch of class. It says that Harvard transcends the petty physicality of some dork in an ugly outfit. Why we would want to spend $3,000 just to create a new object of Yalie derision is beyond us.