Lat Doesn't Appreciate Trials of Coming Out

In his scattered ruminations on National Coming Out Day ("Those 'Happy Homos,'" Opinion, Oct. 18, 1994), David B. Lat mocks and belittles the sincere attempts of the Harvard lesbigay community to gather together in order to celebrate a common identity, and to share in that celebration with friends, neighbors and colleagues.

While he accuses lesbigay support groups of "pressuring the ambivalent to label themselves gay of lesbian." Lat ignores the infinitely more intense pressures on all students to conform to heterosexual norms of behaviour. Lat's suggestion that very few lesbian, gay or bisexual students remain in the closet at Harvard is contradicted by the numerous testimonies of those who find it impossible to come out until after they have graduated. Lat argues that one should be proud only of what one has personally accomplished. According to this restrictive view, I may be Chinese, but because I had no hand in bringing this about and because I do not spend hours each day cultivating my Chineseness, I should not take pride in my cultural heritage.

Moreover, Lat fails to understand that for lesbians, gays and bisexuals, the very process of coming out is a significant personal accomplishment which requires great courage and emotional strength. Coming out begins with self-acceptance, followed by a lifelong struggle to live a fulfilling, productive life, all in the face of resentment and resistance from society at large.

Those of us who succeed and survive share many common experiences and have much about which to be proud. In describing lesbians, gays and bisexuals as "people who are still deeply troubled by their lifestyle choices and desperately seeking a stamp of approval" (something which he insists must be denied), Lat shows none of the "respect, compassion and sensitivity" that the Catholic Catechism purports to prescribe for dealing with "homosexuals."

Lat dismisses National Coming Out Day as "just another event in the recent rash of identity-based pride rallies" which "have devolved into mutual masturbation festivals." Obviously, Lat had a more fruitful Coming Out Day than I did. Even as an archangel in a haven of homosex, all I got was a pink triangle sticker, a bit of disco music and a cute boy to dance with in the Adams House Dining Hall. Did Winthrop (or some other house) really mark the occasion with the exchange of bodily fluids? Sticky, very sticky. --Carsey Yet   Resident Tutor, Adams House