Waiting for Your Mother's Cookies

Does anyone really care about the regular seasons in the NBA and the NHL? Sure, Larry Bird's got enough moves to get anybody a little excited, and the Rangers are on a hot streak, but none of it means anything until the playoffs. Besides, rumor has it that the grass at Fenway is starting to turn green.

You say it's too early to talk about baseball? No way. Mike Torrez has already been booed. Jim Rice has already hit a home run. It's only the Grapefruit League, but it is baseball.

Waiting for opening day is like waiting for your mother's chocolate chip cookies to come out of the oven. You try to do something else, but you keep heading back to the kitchen, thinking about those cookies. Baseball does the same thing to people. I even know someone who went to Fenway and sat on the curb outside for three hours in February. In February!

I didn't go to the park but I have been going crazy wondering about the possibility of the major league players going on strike. It seems likely, since the player vote is now something like 500 to 1 in favor of a walkout. My friend might be on the curb for awhile.

I've also been doing a lot of thinking about the upcoming season. Not about home run totals or anything like that, but just a few odds and ends to keep me occupied until opening day.

Personal Interest

I'm just wondering:

Will Carlton Fisk be able to throw again?

Will Bill Campbell be able to throw again?

Will Tom Poquette be able to throw again?

I know Glenn Hoffman can throw, but can he hit?

Analysts Disagree

I know Billy Martin can hit, but can he manage the lowly A's into contention?

Will the Dodgers play "We Are Family" in their locker room after their games?

Will the San Diego Chicken play left field for the Padres?

How many times will Bobby Bonds be traded?

How many times will Len Barker throw a pitch into the stands?

How many times will the phone ring in the Red Sox bullpen?

How many times will Phil Rizzuto say "holy cow?"

Charges

Is Dave Kingman going to hit a baseball into orbit?

Is Bill Lee ever going to come out of orbit?

Will Atlanta still be in the pennant race in May?

Will Dave Winfield's agent figure out a contact that anyone can understand?

Can Dave Winfield name the ingredients of a Big Mac in under four seconds and if so, will he reveal what's in the special sauce?

I guess that about wraps it up. See you in the bleachers.