Nixon: An Historical Symposium

SAM ERVIN thought that Nixon got into trouble because his gang "undertook to nullify the laws of God and the laws of men."

There is another possibility: Nixon could be in trouble because he tried to nullify the laws of math.

Every presidential election in this century except one was won by the Democrat or Republican whose last name contained more of the letters FROST WINK JUICE than his opponent's. The exception was 1972. The scores:

1900 mCKINlEy 5, bRyaN 2

1904 ROOSEvElT 7, paRKER 4

1908 TaFT 3, bRyaN 2

1912 WIlSON 5, TaFT 3

1916 WIlSON 5, hUghES 3

1920 haRdINg 3, COx 2

1924 COOlIdgE 5, davIS 2

1928 hOOvER 4, SmITh 3

1932 ROOSEvElT 7, hOOvER 4

1936 ROOSEvElT 7, laNdON 3

1940 ROOSEvElT 7, WIllKIE 5

1944 ROOSEvElT 7, dEWEy 3

1948 TRUmaN 4, dEWEy 3

1952 EISENhOWER 9, STEvENSON 8

1956 EISENhOWER 9, STEvENSON 8

1960 KENNEdy 5, NIxON 4

1964 JOhNSON 6, gOldWaTER 5

1968 NIxON 4, hUmphREy 3

Last year Nixon, still with only four letters, went up against mCgOvERN, who had five. What scared Nixon about the election: the Gallup Polls or his name? Why did he feel he had to tap phones, infiltrate opponents' campaigns, manufacture phony letters? Did he realize--and attempt to subvert--the rules of mathematical history?

Nixon won, but was it worth it?