Threskiornis

There are very few places he hasn't visited. He has been seen on Boston's newspaper row, and mingling with the seagulls on the city waterfront; he has gotten a shave and a steambath at local establishments; he has been tete-a-tete with Miss Rosita Royce backstage at the Old Howard; he has visited the Russian delegation in New York City; and, in between, he has occasionally been found on top of the Lampoon building at 44 Bow Street.

But you won't find Thresky (short for Threskiornis, which supposedly stands for Ibis Aethiopia) there now. For the Lampoon's sacred bird-symbol is reportedly still recuperating from injuries received at the hands of the CRIMSON last Spring. And besides that, the years have been tough on this venerable symbol of recent CRIMSON-Lampoon rivalry.

It all started, as far most local historians can remember, sometime around the Second World War. Written records are scarce and biased, but the consensus seems to be that a CRIMSON editor was badly injured by a fall from the Lampoon roof while either stealing the bird or attempting to return it after it had been stolen.

This had a sobering effect for a few years, but in 1951 the CRIMSON once more pirated the sacred Ibis, and started a minor war which has continued on down to the present. The bird had fallen down of its own accord during a storm and had been turned in at the University Lost and Found, where a CRIMSON editor claimed it under false pretenses.

For some reason the Lampoon thought David L. Ratner '52, the rather staid editorial chairman, had stolen its bird, so they kidnapped him and took him to an abandoned house in Ipswich. They took his clothes from him for a night, then gave them back and lashed him to a pot-bellied stove for a group picture. Shortly thereafter, Ratner escaped, and the 'Poon soon recaptured its bird.

After a year of relative quiet on its perch at 44 Bow, the Ibis suddenly disappeared again in April of 1953. This time, however, Thresky was not dragged around to visit strippers and barbers. Instead, he was presented to Semyon K. Tsarapkin, deputy representative of the USSR in the United Nations, to be placed on one of the spires of the new Moscow University. At this, the 'Poon became irritated, and demanded that the Russians return Thresky. Petitions protesting the 'Poon's breach of international courtesy were circulated in the Yard and at Radcliffe, but a 'Poon delegation raced to New York and retrieved their prize from the confused Russians.

In the Spring of 1954 and 1956 Thresky again disappeared mysteriously only to be photographed at various local points of interest. He was returned to the 'Poon offices last June, but will probably not attain his former heights until the 'Poonsters scrape up $45 to cover the cost of resoldering him to his perch. How long he will stay up thereafter is uncertain.