News
HMS Is Facing a Deficit. Under Trump, Some Fear It May Get Worse.
News
Cambridge Police Respond to Three Armed Robberies Over Holiday Weekend
News
What’s Next for Harvard’s Legacy of Slavery Initiative?
News
MassDOT Adds Unpopular Train Layover to Allston I-90 Project in Sudden Reversal
News
Denied Winter Campus Housing, International Students Scramble to Find Alternative Options
Officials in Massachusetts hall are removing the mirrors in preparation for the arrival of Harvard's next president, pictured on the right. The new Yorker's R. Taylor yesterday revealed that this youngster will be Conant's successor. Taylor s the illustrator of "Fractured French" and the author of the cartoon book, "The Better Taylors."
This is the sixth of the scientific series on the University's new chief executive. Taylor explains his forecast in the following terms:
"After considerable research, reflection and certain esoteric rites )to do with a bottle) I find that all sings point to the following:
"A) Perhaps still younger. This is the Age of Youth. Whiskers are vanishing. B) While the tendency has been toward more head-hair, it is fairly safe to assume that the crew-cut, now pretty well established in academic circles, especially with the young, will prevail. C) Eyebrows appear to have become heavier (see Conant), therefore it would seem reasonable to expect heavier brows than formerly. D) Eyeglasses come an go, but since two out of the last three presidents have worn em, I feel if not too extreme to look forward to double lenses. This is the least accurate, perhaps, of the items in my prognostication. There may well be contact-lenses, in the spirit of the times.
"ED The nose appears to be shrinking. F) Ditto ears, G) If Conant's is any indication of a trend, we may expect a breeder grin. B) The chin, in the American male, seems to be diminishing. There many be little or none of this. 1) Dress is, of course, becoming less and less formal. If may be that tirelessness and colorlessness will be the order of the day.
"NOTE: Cheer up, fellers, these prophesies seldom mean a thing."
Want to keep up with breaking news? Subscribe to our email newsletter.