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THE MAIL

By A. B. H.

To the Editor of the Crimson:

. . . The University, ever keeping its eye on the higher cultural and esthetic values, has done its best to minimize the annoyance that good food offers to an earnest young man, and no one can quarrel with the variety of peculiar and ingenious solutions. But the efforts of the Kirkland House Committee seem to me to be less skillfully devised. Now that Lent is over, I am not sure that the formula of bad meals eaten in silence will be enough to restrain undergraduate vernal exuberance.

I wish therefore to propose . . . the obvious solution: that the University make arrangements with the Turkish government to purchase the entire stocks of black samite veils, which were seized at the time of the confiscation of the late Sultan's harem, and add them to the waitresses' uniforms.

. . . I have a second plan. I propose to the Kirkland House Committee that they supplant these red-clothed creatures of the flesh by a corps of cunuchs to steal silently up to the doors of the rooms, leave the tray, and then vanish when the scholars of Kirkland House weary from wrestling alone with knowledge and culture . . . and come out to munch on a little Veal Saute or Beef a la Dutch. William N. Parker 1G.

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