News

When Professors Speak Out, Some Students Stay Quiet. Can Harvard Keep Everyone Talking?

News

Allston Residents, Elected Officials Ask for More Benefits from Harvard’s 10-Year Plan

News

Nobel Laureate Claudia Goldin Warns of Federal Data Misuse at IOP Forum

News

Woman Rescued from Freezing Charles River, Transported to Hospital with Serious Injuries

News

Harvard Researchers Develop New Technology to Map Neural Connections

A PLAN TO END PLANS

NO WRITER ATTRIBUTED

What this country needs is a counter-falter and murderer, a perfect criminal, secret, unscrupulous, ruthless, yet with high moral purpose. Given this un-catchable, unknown Robin Hood, America's problems of recovery, reform, and revolution would be solved.

First this perfect criminal, being supremely intelligent would murder all the dangerous politicians. To do this without public suspicions will be very difficult, but hardly impossible for one such as we have described. Even should it be gossipped that the many deaths were unnatural, other dangerous figures might find it desirable to retire.

Next, our criminal would counterfeit billions of dollars of United States money and distribute it haphazardly among the poor. This inflation would not scare business men, but give them profits. The poor at the same time leave us. Employment would increase. Recovery would have arrived.

When the boom was rising, a mysterious message would appear in the United States Treasury, telling the whole story. By that time it would be too late to renounce recovery, no matter how hard the administration tried. Selfish and stupid people the country over would have been fooled out of their depression.

This is no mere unpractical philosophy. It is America's hope. Large body-guards bear mute witness to the possibility of the first part. As for the counterfeiting, criminals have recently developed the art to an almost perfect degree. Several dies were found for producing fifty cent pieces only recently. Perhaps crime will make its last beautiful gesture to us before it is obliterated from this country forever.

Want to keep up with breaking news? Subscribe to our email newsletter.

Tags