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HOLDS HURRY BIGGEST MENACE FOR STUDENTS

FRUIT TYCOON PICKS HARVARD TO BEAT YALE IN '35

NO WRITER ATTRIBUTED

Harvard students work too hard thinks George Cristos, merchant prince, who owns and manages the fruit stand opposite the New Lecture Hall.

"Always they run from one class to another, always they hurry. How am I to sell my goods," he pointed to an imposing array of raw carrots, lettuce, bananas, oranges, and apples, "If they all the time rush by?"

European Methods

Mr. Cristos then compared the American and European people, pointing out that the latter have a better understanding of life, and therefore, get more enjoyment out of it.

"In Greece, they all know how to take it easy. When I was a boy I used to see students take time out between classes at a wine shop, but here it is so different." Mr. Cristos polished an apple on his sleeve till it sparkled brilliantly.

"But the United States, they are so young. That is why. My people for thousands of years have been getting culture. In America, you still got to invent it. In Greece, we got lots of culture already.

Athenian Culture

"Our culture is all over. You walk any places in Athens, and you find culture. It's wonderful. Little kids play around the old statues. Even babies get it. Our culture is pretty swell, you betcha."

Giving no time for a reply, the banana king added, "But do not get the idea, I got anything against them Harvard boys. They're all plenty smart, you betcha, and next year they'll beat Yale."

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