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"My ambition" said Fred Allen, one of the three leading stars in "Three's a Crowd," is to see two dwarfs having a tug-of-war with a piece of dental floss." When asked to explain this statement Mr. Allen merely shrugged and said, "you asked the question: and there is a straight and honest answer, what mere do you want."
"You know," he continued glancing at an evening paper lying on his dressing poem table in the Colonial Theatre, "this man Stimson always seems to be frowning at something: first it's France, then Mexico, and now he gets in a long distance frown at Japan. If he keeps on frowning pretty soon his mustache will join forces with his hair and he will enter the Boston Dog Show as an English sheepdog"
Threading his way through assembled chorus girls, stage men ropes and trunks, he then went on in the famous telephone skid. Coming on stage he signed, "The trouble with a show's running a long time is that people social all the original stuff, so that new joke material has to be thought up all the time. If is the same way with the music, only we can't change that although the radios make everyone familiar with the tunes in the show long before people ever get to see it." Changing the subject suddenly he said. "You know there is no excuse for being fat, especially for women being bigger of people after hearing the adage about "your eyes being bigger than you stomach promptly rush into a self-serving lunch room and try to make their stomachs bigger than their eyes." Mr. Allen now began climbing inside a polar explorer's fur suit, remarking or the general depression in the theatre business. "The trouble with this racket is that all the shows has gone out of the hands of the theatrical families who knew how to amuse people, and into the hands of the business men who don't know a good show from high school and other where talent used to be tried out.
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