THE WORST IS YET TO COME, SAYS LEACOCK

Stephen Leacock conclusively proved last evening in the Union that literature is getting sillier and sillier--he proved it so conclusively that the appreciative crowd of students from the University and Radcliffe that packed the Living Room was kept in a continuous uproar of merriment. Professor C. T. Copeland '82, introduced the speaker.

The humorist divided his address into three parts, concerning himself with the literature of the Victorian Age, of the late 19th century, and with modern literature, and described the hero, heroine and general plot which characterized each. In the Victorian period, we knew at the outset of the book that the hero and heroine would be married, and we were satisfied, for that's what we wanted. And when the novel ended with the sweet wedding bells, we were glad we read it.

"Strong Sentiment of Today"

"But the trouble with this," explained the great political economist, "was that it wasn't tough enough for the readers' taste. So a novel developed that was staged in the open, where the heroine was always Miss Middleton--always the Miss." Mr. Leacock went on to describe the hair-breadth escape from the Apaches of the typical couple alone far out in the wilderness; how the hero lowers the girl 200 feet down a precipice with his lariat, and they ride off together over the prairie to the little railway station, where they are to separate forever.

"And all this time never a word of love between them. Think of riding hundreds of miles together and always--'Miss Middleton' and 'Mr. Smith.' And then the train approaches."

The speaker quoted the climactic words, "'Kate,' he said, 'Do you know what I was thinking when you were half-way down that cliff? I was thinking that if the rope had broken I would be very sorry,' 'So would I, answered Miss Middleton."

Enter the Eternal Triangle

"But this wasn't satisfactory. We come to the indoor novel again. The modern man doesn't want a book where the people are sure to be married; he wants a story where the people can't get married because they're married already. His story always begins in cabaret where 'The Man' meets the 'Wife of the Other Man' what a fascination those words have for him! The point of the modern novel is to get these two into some delicate position, we used to call it indelicate. The proper situation is this: The Man must walk by accident by accident remember into Her room. Personally I don't see anything embarrassing in this; I've had it happen to me by accident actual times. 'His veins surged and his breath came in quick short pants. She sensed his presence and fronted him full. "Back" she feed. He had come nearer. She could hear his pants as he spoke. And then the door closed and there stood the husband."