Janitors.

Sometime ago I had the pleasure of giving to the public the results of an interview with a representative goodie. It was my intention to publish, immediately following, the results of an interview with a representative janitor; but very greatly unexpected circumstances came in my way. I found such an interview impossible. Day after day and week after week, morning, noon, and afternoon, I have called at the janitor's room, only to find him out. But for certain circumstances, which I shall mention later, I would have doubted that there was any janitor about at all. However, perhaps it is well that I could not hold the interview. Who knows that I would now be able to write, had I dared to interview a janitor ? The matter of this article, then, must be from my own experiences, or from nothing more reliable than hearsay.

I have the janitor take care of my fire. He usually arrives in the morning at about five o'clock, never later than six, except on very cold mornings-on such mornings he is very early at eight. His approach, arrival, and entrance, are all matters of great interest to me. The nature of his movements is very fortunate. I am awakened by the distant but slow approaching dill of his tread, so that the bursting open of the door, like the grande finale of a series of thunder claps is not as alarming as it might be; the previous rolling thunder has prepared me. Once entered, with mighty hand he seizes hold of my stove and dances it about the room, for a few minutes, I suppose,-it really seems ages,-then rattles the coal on, picks open the drafts, slams the stove door and the door of my room, and is gone, gone as mysteriously as a fairy, if not quite as gracefully and noiselessly. When will I see him again ? Tomorrow morning ? Probably.

I have recently been examining some of the bills that I paid during my freshman year. Here is one of them, which I confess I thought rather large, but which I paid, being a freshman and thinking it all right, always having heard a good deal of talk about Cambridge high prices.

Mr. Snodkins,

To Jewlian Moneymaker, Esq., Dr., Sept. '83.-Putting down carpets, $5.00 Sept. '83-Jan. '84.-Taking care of fire, 30.00

Nov. 7.-For seeing to the putting in of your coal, 10.00

Sept. '83-Jan. '84.-For other services, 2.00

Sept '83-Jan. '84.-Miscellaneous, 15.00

Total, $65.00

Credit for errors, 3.00.

Balance, $62.00

Paid. JEWLIAN MONEYMAKER, ESQ.This is the bill, which speaks for it self. I hardly need to say that the "credit for errors" was made at my suggestion. The distinction between "other services" and "miscellaneous" is certainly an ingenious one.

I must stop here. I had hoped to write more, but looking over that bill, which I paid, has been too much for me. I ought to have reserved it for the last. The reader must draw his own conclusions. If his janitor is like mine, then he will take pleasure in knowing that he is not the sole victim, that with greater likelihood the victims are legion, as many as the year has days, or as Harvard has students.

NEMO.