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BOYLSTON'S BLEAK BLOCKS.

NO WRITER ATTRIBUTED

"The iconoclast's hammer waves high 'gainst the stern and rock-bound wall." - Gimlet.

THE stable, stately solidity of Boylston's Bleak Blocks is fast being changed, but into what no one has yet found out, though the surmises are many. Some think that the men who are hammering away day by day at the walls are men who take field work in geology, in search of specimens. Others say that a new mining company has been organized, called the Boylston Bonanza, and that there are millions in those stones.

One of those things on the Herald, hearing it was to be changed into a retreat for escaped convicts, or those whose offence deserved a more severe sentence than six months in Parker's, interviewed Warmsoup, the janitor at large, who said he had seen it stated in the Tin Pop Gun that Boylston was to be removed to St. Petersburg, and to be fitted up and used as the Czar's palace, as it was considered the only bomb-proof building in the world.

The Tin Pop Gun also stated that it was to be removed in pieces, and that great care had been exerted in selecting men who would clip the blocks so that the chips would fit in with each other. Two men had finally been engaged who had just served a sentence of ten years for clipping coins. These men had been a long time out of practice, and as great care had to be exercised in clipping, they were ordered to clip only one minute at a time and then rest for two, so as to nerve themselves for the next minute. Under the workingmen velvet was to be placed, so as to keep the chips from falling on the lawn and ruining it. At midnight they were to be carefully removed and shipped to Russia, where they were to be fastened together by a new sticking-plaster just invented by a Freshman.

This report conflicts to some extent with one which has just reached here, viz., that instead of shipping Boylston to Russia it is to be painted red, white, and blue, and put up at the World's Fair, in which General Grant is to receive his callers and presents. The latest despatch comes from New York, saying that O'Beery has offered to give away a debt of $2,000, incurred at the last walking-match, to any man who can smooth off the blocks of Boylston in 365 consecutive days. Two men have entered, the Chinese professor and Connors. As there are 1,365 blocks altogether in Boylston, and as two men can clip two and one-eighth stones in one day 25 hours and 76 minutes, one will see at a glance that men who are now betting six to one that the Chinese professor will complete it in three years are sure losers.*

The only reliable paper in Boston, the Globe, announces as a matter of fact that Boylston is to be removed, so as to make a straight-away coast for the Cambridge children from the hill in front of the President's house to Wadsworth house; and that the Bursar proposes to lease the land for a grazing tract during the months of July, August, and September, and that the Faculty have voted to let the students use it for a lawn tennis ground from October until the snow is eight inches deep. That settles it.

* It has just been learned that the Chinese professor requested Connors to call off his dogs, and give an Eastern gentleman a show; but on Connors's refusal the Chinese professor dropped out, so all bets are off

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