MATRICULATED BUT NOT INITIATED.

I.

THE Prex saw the Freshman from afar,

Where he "wandered lonely as a" - star.

So he polkaed near

With an air severe,

And he said, "You agree

A dig to be,

On pain of forfeiting your degree."

Said the Fresh, "Oh yes,

I guess no less

Will satisfy you

And carry me through;

And, as I affect

Some self-respect,

That's just what I intend to do."

For this Freshman was such a verdant fool,

I doubt if he'd ever been to school.

II.

Said the Prex, "You must go

Through the rain and the snow,

When you hear the bell,

To the cold chapel;

You must not stay away

For a single day;

'T would get you in a very bad way."

Said the Fresh, "Oh yes," &c.

III.

Said the Prex, "At prayers

You must list to the airs

Which are sung by a choir

Which is all we desire.

Though each has a cold,

And the song's very old,

To criticise you must not be bold."

Said the Fresh, "Oh yes," &c.

IV.

"You must not clutch your hat

When they sing very flat;

If the tenor's erratic,

Feel just as ecstatic.

'T is too great a boon

To importune

That they should always sing in tune."

Said the Fresh, "Oh yes," &c.

V.

Said the Prex, "Do you hear?

In the Freshman year

You must follow the ruts,

And never take cuts.

Though you don't care a d - n

You must conjugate ???,

And get up the use of the particle ???."

Said the Fresh, "Oh yes," &c.

VI.

"Don't forget, everybody

Comes here to study.

You never must shirk

One atom of work.

That man's either mad

Or very, very bad,

Who with shameless assurance says, 'Unprepared.'"

Said the Fresh, "Oh yes," &c.

VII.

"Beware of a crony

Who thinks himself tony.

The solid and good

Are always tabooed.

You can't be popular,

What's the use! -

And popular men all go to the d - ce."

Said the Fresh, "Oh yes," &c.

VIII.

"Inform the class

That the teacher's an ass,

By an interrogation

Which shows information.

You will wax very wise

In the students' eyes,

Though in the professor much anger arise."

Said the Fresh, "Oh yes," &c.

IX.

"If you chance to think

The professor won't wink

At your little rebellion,

Though you're such a hellion,

After class you may better it

By discussing the preterit,

And how 't is the new-fangled fashion to letter it."

Said the Fresh, "Oh yes," &c.

X.

"Never long for variety

Nor for society.

If you want relaxation,

A good dissertation

Will answer as well

As some mad carnival,

Imported directly by students from h - ll."

Said the Fresh, "Oh yes," &c.

XI.

"I never have favored

Those students ill-savored

Who prefer the aroma

Of Carl's to their Homer.

And would rather pretend

To enjoy a good friend,

Than to know Stuart Mill from beginning to end."

Said the Fresh, "Oh yes," &c.

XII.

"A truly good boy,

His dear mother's joy,

Will try to do

As I want him to.

And you must have gleaned

That I always have leaned

Towards that man who's a 'mucker,' a 'thing,' and a 'fiend.'"

Said the Fresh, "Oh yes,

I guess no less

Will satisfy you,

And carry me through.

And, as I affect

Some self-respect,

That's just what I intend to do."

For this Freshman was such a verdant fool,

I doubt if he'd ever been to school.

W. P. E.