Football Season Taking Shape

Once, at a party a few years back, I polished off a drink and began searching for a beverage to replenish my Solo. I didn’t have to look very far as, across the room, I spotted a glowing bottle of vodka. It was radiating a Pikachu-yellow, and (like the Double Rainbow Guy) I wondered, “What does this mean?” Pulled into its vodka tractor beam, I walked over to the magical liquid and examined it more closely. It appeared to be a high-quality brand of alcohol which, when exposed to a black light, shone like a jar of fireflies.

“Must have some tasty vitamins,” I figured, pouring myself a splash. I went bottoms-up with my Solo.

Immediately, before I even knew what evil had deflowered my taste buds, I spit the whole mouthful out in a fluorescent cloud. Forensics revealed it was a mix of highlighter fluid and rubbing alcohol which, when combined with a black light at a party, makes a very tasteful, though poor-tasting, decoration.

This story has everything to do with Harvard football. In Week 1, the Crimson looked like the 1920 Rose Bowl champions. Harvard dominated Holy Cross in every phase of the game—offense, defense, special teams, and even crowd attendance. The Crimson sparkled like the luminous potion in that crowded dorm room.

But in Week 2, once we got a taste of Ivy League football, Harvard proved to be demonstrably worse than its first impression. Brown, which was picked to finish below Harvard in the preseason, thoroughly dismantled the Crimson, running up a 23-0 lead to start the game and winning easily, 29-14. This stunning turnaround left many people scratching their heads, and more than a few times I’ve been asked, “So does that mean Harvard’s championship dreams are over?”

The answer is, “No.”

To go back to my little allegory: after I spit out the highlighter cocktail, I raced to the bathroom sink and tongued the innocence out of the faucet. A few minutes later, I was back on the dance floor as if the whole thing had never happened.

The Crimson has a similar chance to right the ship. This weekend, it travels to Easton, Pa., to face Lafayette in a non-conference matchup. The Leopards are winless so far this year with losses (albeit narrow ones) to both Penn and Princeton. This game gives Harvard exactly what it needs: an opportunity to work out the kinks before rejoining the chase for the Ivy League title. One loss has not put the crown out of the Crimson’s reach, but two certainly might.

ALBANY (1-2, 0-1 NEC) at YALE (2-0, 1-0 Ivy)

After lighting up Georgetown to the tune of 45 points in its first game, the Bulldog offense continued to roll last weekend in a 21-7 win over Cornell. Junior running back Alex Thomas’ 107.0 yards per game average is best in the league by almost 30 yards, and junior quarterback Patrick Witt is tops among Ivy signal-callers in passing yards per game with 319.5.

Since its 3-0 pillow-fight against Maine, Albany has dropped two straight and been outscored, 87-31. Yale should roll over the Great Danes before facing Dartmouth next week.

Pick: Yale 30, Albany 13.

BROWN (2-0, 1-0 Ivy) at RHODE ISLAND (1-2, 1-0 CAA)

The Bears defense was beyond impressive last weekend as it held Harvard’s offense to -16 rushing yards and 112 total yards. Yet, its offense struggled at times. Brown settled for six field goals of which freshman kicker Alexander Norocea hit five. The Bears can’t rely on a young kicker for scoring for very long before it catches up to them.

Though URI dropped its first two games, it rallied hard last week in its conference-opener against then-No. 8 UNH. With the Rams trailing, 25-21, late in the fourth quarter, senior defensive end Victor Adesanya sacked Wildcat quarterback R.J. Toman, forcing a fumble that was scooped up by freshman defensive lineman James Timmins and returned 39 yards for the winning score.

Although both teams are coming off emotional victories, Brown will not be able to feed of the energy of a sell-out crowd as it did last week. I’m penciling in URI for the win.

Pick: URI 20, Brown 10.

CORNELL (0-2, 0-1 Ivy) at BUCKNELL (0-3, 0-0 Patriot)

The battle of the ’nells, at least one of which will earn its first, and perhaps only, win of the season. Who will it be?

Cornell, the least productive offense in the Ivies, has put up only 14 points in its two games and allowed 62. Bucknell, which led Dartmouth, 20-9, at the half before allowing 34 unanswered points, has at least been competitive in each game. I’ll give the edge to the home team.

Pick: Bucknell 17, Cornell 7.

DARTMOUTH (2-0, 0-0 Ivy) at PENN (1-1, 0-0 Ivy)

When I saw the Big Green’s record, I asked out loud, “When did Dartmouth get good?” But after a little research, I found out they beat down Sucknell and barely survived Sacred Fart. I’m not impressed.

The Quakers, on the other hand, have beaten Lafayette and, last week, took No. 1 Villanova down to the wire before falling, 22-10. Penn is knocking at the doorstep of the Top-25 and should climb into the rankings next week after it takes care of the Big Green.

Pick: Penn 24, Dartmouth 10.

PRINCETON (1-1, 0-0 Ivy) at COLUMBIA (1-1, 0-0 Ivy)

In the animal kingdom, I’m inclined to believe that a lion would beat a tiger, but not on the gridiron.

Columbia beat a not-very-talented Towson team last week after falling to Fordham in the opener. The Lions, which sit in the middle of the league in almost every statistical category, are remarkably average.

Princeton could very well be 0-2. Last week, it took the Tigers two overtimes to dispose of Lafayette and escape with a 36-33 win. But Princeton has the most prolific quarterback-wide receiver combo in the league with junior passer Tommy Wornham and senior wide out Trey Peacock. I expect the duo will carve up the Columbia defense and lead the Tigers to victory.

Pick: Princeton 28, Columbia 17.

HARVARD (1-1, 0-1 Ivy) at LAFAYETTE (0-3, 0-1 Patriot)

Last year, the Leopards destroyed the Crimson, 35-18, in Harvard’s most lopsided loss. This year, Lafayette finds itself in dire circumstances; another defeat and the season might spiral out of control. Already, the Leopards lost 19-14 to a very good Penn team and 36-33 (2 OT) to Princeton, so this game will provide a good barometer for the Crimson’s position in the Ivy League hierarchy.

Harvard needs this game to recover some of its swagger. The game has no direct bearing on the Ivy League race, but it could determine the direction of the team for the rest of the Crimson’s season. Harvard has won eight of the last nine meetings, so I’m giving them a slim edge.

Pick: Harvard 14, Lafayette 10.

—Staff writer Timothy J. Walsh can be reached at twalsh@fas.harvard.edu.