Top Five 'Bring It On' Films (Based Solely on Their Wikipedia Synopses)

I have never seen any of the “Bring It On” movies. I was too busy watching “You Got Served,” “Drumline,” “Step Up 3D,” “Stomp The Yard 2: Homecoming,” “Save the Last Dance,” and “Breakin’ 2: Electric Boogaloo.”

5. “Bring It On Again” (2003)

Okay, I could not even follow the Wikipedia summary for this one. There is apparently a lot of backstabbing. But, in the end, the main character wins the cheer competition. I think. There’s something about gathering up outcasts and forming a ragtag squad of misfits. I’m not even sure. This is clearly the worst installment.

4. “Bring It On: Fight To The Finish” (2009)

Christina Milian plays Lina, a cheerleader from LA who transfers to a prep school after her gold-digging mom marries a rich guy. She has a crush on a basketball player, Evan, but then she breaks up with him. But then they get back together in the end? Lina recruits her other friends from L.A., Gloria and Treyvonetta, to join her squad. At some point, the cheer team goes to something called a “flavour school” to work on their moves. Also, their mascot is the most intimidating of animals, the Sea Lion. Lina wins the cheer competition. This seems like a fun movie.

3. “Bring It On: In It To Win It” (2007)

It’s a showdown at Camp Spirit-Thunder, where the Sharks face off against their rivals, the Jets, in an obvious “‘West Side Story”’ allusion. The Sharks gain possession of the Spirit Stick, but someone steals it. Anyway, after the Spirit Stick disappears, the Sharks hold some odd cultish ceremony to appeal to the “Cheer Gods.” The Sharks are then interrupted when the Jets show up for a “cheer-rumble.” The Sharks and Jets reluctantly combine teams to become the “Shets” and beat a rival camp in a cheer competition. This one is ranked third only because the name “Shets” makes it so easy to rip on this movie.

2. “Bring It On” (2000)

There are a lot of copied routines, and some weird racial tension in this one. Unfortunately, I have to dock some points because Kirsten Dunst is awful. In addition, reading the summary of this one reminded me of the band B*Witched and their cover of “Mickey.” Remember when Jesse Bradford was an actor who actually had some clout? I don’t. Also, did you know that “Bring It On”’ was known as “Cheers!” in Japan?

1. “Bring It On: All Or Nothing” (2006)

Britney is relocated to a more impoverished neighborhood, Crenshaw Heights, and has to battle her former squad mate from Pacific Vista High. This installment coins numerous influential terms, such as “cheerwhore.” The teams compete for a chance to appear in Rihanna’s music video. Crenshaw Heights manages to beat Pacific Vista in the cheer competition with their secret weapon: krumping. The victorious squad gets to appear in Rihanna’s video for “Pon De Replay” and wins brand new computers for their entire school. But really, aren’t we all winners?

—Brian A. Feldman is the incoming Web Editor. He has a lot of opinions about things that he has never watched, listened to, or read.